Kung Fu Grip Massage

I found another food that will sustain me. I can say that I actually really like it, and I will actually go out of my way to buy it in the states. I am not sure what it is made of, but I think it will help me safely maintain a lactose tolerance. Would you like to know what it is?

Aloe Yogurt

You probably didnt see that one coming, but its G-O-O-D. It even has chunks of something that I have to assume is aloe. I imagine it lubricating my lower intestines. Its good. If you see it, try it.

Thursday night I went to this open air street market with Mike and I have to tell you that it highly motivates me to do all of my shopping from now on in China. SO inexpensive, and they have everything you could want. You want a gun? They got them! You want a pimp jade ring? They got them! You want a Coach purse? They got something that looks like them, and might actually be them... Seriously, its really cool. Here is a picture:

One of two streets forming an "L" in the street market

So if you are a mom, you are probably reading the part about buying guns and thinking that Im in a crime-zone. Well dont worry because 1: I dont think the guns really work, they look pretty old, and 2: I was noting to Mike that I really dont feel like there is any crime in Hangzhou. He said I was pretty much correct, and the reason for that is that the officials here dont mess around. One of the teachers at school told Mike that they arrested a drug dealer (a decent sized drug dealer) the other day. They let him sit for 2 days in jail, then they said, "Ok, you can go", then they shot him. I dont know if its true, but regardless of whether it is or not, the story is out and will at least deter crime. They dont mess around here and it shows.

Now to add another kind of funny story, Isabelle (shown in a previous picture) told me the other day that she was trying to find the ticket office. She was lost and asked 2 policemen for directions. They tried to tell her where to go but she didnt really understand, but pretended to understand and walked away. So then she is walking down the street trying to read her map, and the same police officers pull up and tell her that they will take her to the ticket office. So she's like: "ok", and gets in the car. They decide that now is the kind of time that you are supposed to use the sirens, and proceed to speed through town to get her to the ticket office. Then the usher her inside, push people out of line, and put her at the front of the line. Then afterwards, one of the policemen gives Isabelle his card and says if she needs anything to give him a call. So the moral of the story is that it pays to be a girl.

This is a guy that I saw selling pieces of a big cake off the back of his bike.
I thought it was cool.

Alittle interesting information for you is that I have found that alot of students at this language school are studying on holiday. Like they have a 2-3 week break and thought that they would learn/brush up on Chinese. Just an interesting concept that I would not have really thought of doing, but totally a different type of vacation. I can definately appreciate it.

On the note of studying chinese, I am going to put this bit of reflection in more for me to look back on, than for your entertainment. I have found a strange satisfaction studying the 3 way connection between English, Pinyin (the pronounciation) and the characters. Most notable, is the interest that I have studying the characters. Some of the combinations that the chinese use to express something (like a feeling) speaks deeply about the nature of man. Example: the symbol for happiness is the combination of a woman and a baby.... and I believe that the word for noise is 3 women. I'm not joking. Just reading this concept on paper does little to glorify it, but when you are actually studying it and trying to comprehend something tangible to hold on to, it makes you feel like you are tapping centuries of history pertaining to the transformation of feelings into writing. ....but then again I also heard that the whole written language was revised about 60-80 years ago...so maybe its all in my head.

This kid had no crotch on this pants, front nor back.
I think he pee-ed near where I was sitting.

So now onto the title of this entry, the kung fu grip massage. Friday I went swimming with Ian, Lucy and Alice. I dont get the feeling of cleanliness from the locker room for the public pool, and I have found that most chinese people cannot really swim, but they dont care because its all relative right? I paid for my locker, tip toe-ed through the locker room, through the shower with men hocking lugis (the chinese men are not shy about pulling stuff deep from the depths of their throats in public), and through the foot bath where the water has probably washed the feet of the last 200+ patrons. I kept thinking about how Jon would handle this.

Anyways, after the swim, Ian the retired Australian entrepreneur told me he was going to get a massage. So I said sure I would tag along for the experience, which it turned out to be. This was the first time either of us had received a rub-down in the same room as a buddy of ours. And about the rub-down, this girl put the hurt on. I was laying on my back and she started with my face, on which she pushed all the pressure points, including the forward wall on the inside of my ear canal. Then there was this part where she was basically punching me in the forehead. I could not help but chuckle because she was thwacking me on my forehead. I was thinking that if I left feeling lightheaded and relaxed, it was because I just got punched in the face. Then she did the other standard rub-down stuff like cracking my knuckles, taking my loose arm by the fingers and whip-twisting it in the socket, then snapping my joints close to the point of gentle hyper-extension (kind of like when you take your belt, fold it in half, then pull the ends to make that slapping noise?). All in all, I would liken the massage to some type of submission wrestling and say it was a decent experience.

Ok, last I want to recommend that you take a cab in Hangzhou late on a warm night with the windows down, weaving and speeding through crowded streets with an electronic techno version of Beverly Hills Cops blaring out the radio. Its fun. Oh, some insight into asian drivers in america. I think they have a bad rap. Here is the thing: the wrath of american road rage has nothing on the everyday behavior of Chinese cab drivers. They will basically drive in your back seat, then take your sideview mirror off when the pass you. They are familiar with their horn, and if they can edge their car in front of your bus, then it means that they have the right of way. So naturally, Chinese non-cab drivers develop a very thick skin, maybe to the point of being oblivious, but hey are just doing their thang. Therefore, if you see a chinese guy driving down the road doing 45 in a 70 zone, give him a break because he has probably straight off the boat and been seasoned to just take care of whats in front of him. He is a race horse with the blinders on....a fine tuned athlete in the zone.

On monday, Lucy is going to give me accupuncture in class. She said that shes done it once or twice before and feels pretty good about it. Just kidding, she is an eastern medicine doctor turned teacher and her mother is a very famous herbalist, so its in her blood.